Todd Charles Newton

My Toddy <3 Today Sept 5th 2014 would have been your 25th Bday. I have had 3 perfect days in my life! and one of those days was when you were born <3 You came into the world a month earlier then expected.... You were just a lil guy 4 lbs 16 oz. You were soooo little. But handsome and strong for a lil man. You grew fast and before I knew it you were almost bigger then Sean :) you two were sooo cute aat first he didnt like you much, he was jealous. BUT it wasnt long before he wanted to hold you and help me take care of you and you two became inseperable. You grew from that lil preemie baby into a buff young man who luved sports and luved his family more then anything. I remember some of the jokes you played on me and I cant believe I fell for some of them lol they were good Toddy I will give you that :) you got me on more then one occasion. Some of the best moments of my life were spent watching you on the football field. How proud you made me. you were a class act and I was sooo blessed to be your Mom <3 You had a heart of gold and would gladly sacrifice sooo much of yourself for your team... your friends and most of all your family.

Today ..... I wonder what you would be doing at the age of 25? would you have children? what kind of job would you have? would you be married? what would you have named your kids? I miss seeing the closeness I know you would have with your nephew and godson Brennen and most of all I miss the hugs and kiss;s on the forhead that you allways made sure you gave me everytime I saw you. I miss seeing you and Sean go back and forth and arguing over who was right and then make up by shooting hoops in the yard. I miss the way you would put your arm around Nikki and protect her from the cruel world around her and tell her how special she was.... you were an amazing son BUT an evern more amzing brother that would protect your brother and sister from anything!

Today on your 25th Birthday in Heaven I am sending you all the luv and prayers that I have <3 I wish you were here and  I wish you never would have left BUT I have faith you are in good hands and I promise one day we will again be together and I will hug you tighter then ever before it will be like we had never been seperated and I will just hold you.... and we will laugh again... we will be ONE again <3 just like we were on Sept 5, 1989 when I brought you into this world and you made me the happiest Momma on earth..... I long for that day and until then I will keep our luv safe in my heart and even of 50 more bdays pass I will never EVER forget you.... MY LIL MAN <3 Rest Easy My love and I know today in Heaven all of the angels are throwing you a party <3 a party fit for a KING <3

A new memory im making with Brennen something we do everytime Brennen is at the house and as he gets older he has more questions about Todd.... where he is and why he cant come home and be with us. I have explained to Brennen that Uncle Toddy is in Heaven he is in a place with angels... where there are big fluffy clouds that you can sleep on and jump on, waterfalls and rainbows and all your wishes come true.... a beautful place where Todd now lives with our dogs Sohia and Forty. Brennen and I pray to Todd before Bed at night and ask him to watch over us and the rest of our family and we tell Todd how much we miss and luv him and even though we cant see him he is in our hearts and allways will be. I make sure that Brennen knows how much his Uncle Todd and his Godfather luved him and I will continue that for as long as I am here to do so. Its amazing how close Brennen feels to Todd even though they only knew each other for one short year its like they are somehow linked together and Brennen faithfully kisses Todds picture each time he passes it.... that makes my heart ache a lil bit less knowing that even after I am no longer here thier will be someone else to talk about Todd, tell stories of him, and make sure the memory of my son lives on <3 My grandson is a gift from God and I think he was given to us to help heal the wound that loosing Todd left.... that will never heal but Brennens laughter, hugs, smile, and his luv help me go on and get thru days that sometimes I dont think I can get thru. I see so much of Todd in Brennen ....

Toddy you would have been soo proud too know that soo many people showed up at the field on May 22nd 2011 to celebrate who he was and to play a baseball game in his honor. When I saw all those cars pulling in and all those people showing up for my son and too support our family it made my sadness a little less knowing that my son is still luved and thought of sooo fondly even 2 yrs later... I was soo proud too be his mother and it is obvious he left a lasting impression in the hearts of many I watched Brennen run around with the #40 painted on his lil face as well as the other lil kids.... It tears at my heartstrings knowing Todd isnt here too see Brennen grow up... But I think he watches from afar and is an angel to Many... but especially too Brennen who he luved soo very much, I will allways update his memorial  website NO matter how many more years I live without my son and someday i will sit down with Brennen and we will look at his site and all the memories that we have of Todd... the candles lit by those he luved... BooBoo will allways feel like uncle todd was there when he was growing up because i will make sure he never is forgotten and allways fresh in the mind of Brennen newton.... his godson, his nephew and his lil buddy. BooBoo Newton will allways know he HAS an Uncle Todd who know lives in the Sky with the Moon, the stars and The Angels.....

You left a legacy Todd.... in your short 19 years you left a lifetime of memories... WHAT every person in this world STRIVES for.... which is too leave behind a MEMORY that lasts a lifetime you did that and more in 19 years!!! what an accomplishment that is.... You may have left this world physically my lil man BUT your still ALIVE in the hearts of sooooo Many and I could not be prouder too be your Mom. I promise too say your name and tell stroies of you to ANYONE who will listen :) and allways celebrate the 22nd of May.... either with your many friends and family.... or just by myself.... as a day you left this world too return home too God and the ones who lluv you and left before you...I will turn that sad day into a day of remembering YOU and HOW YOU LIVED LIFE TO THE FULLEST! HOW YOU LUVED AND LAUGHED like there was NO tommorow :) You are in Heaven and I know you are there doing great things and learning many lessons and spending eternal moments with your Nana and Grampa..... I know you will be there waiting for me Todd Charles and what a reunion the two of us will have..... I live for the day I walk into your arms again xoxo Luv Your Mom and alllways your #1 Fan ... "Till We Meet Again" ~~40~~

I sit here at my desk at work everyday and look at all your pictures... NOT one day passes that I dont think of you and miss you. Your left me with sooo many awesome memories in the short 19 years I was lucky enough to have you. One thing about you Todd Newton you could allways make me laugh, ALLWAYS even when I didnt want too, there you were with that huge smile too turn my frown ... upside down. Or a bige hug and kiss on my forehead. You had such a kind heart lil man. I am so proud of who you were and the caring young man you became... You were allways the one at every family event whose voice would travel above everyone elses, who's laugh we could hear throguhout the house and the one that we could count on for a good joke :) I wish you were here too see how much Sean has changed.... he has matured into such a great father he has been strong for me when i couldnt be and he is soo good to Brennen, Nikki... she is graduating in June and become a confident young lady and learned to stand on her own even though she misses you so much, Dustin...is in the US Army and has made our family sooo proud I cant tell you how proud I am of him and i know you watch over him, Derek.... I know you allways looked up to Derek and I can see why, he is such a great young man and he is in love with an awesome girl and has his own place now. Nana and Popa.... they are strong and doing great things for our soldiers overseas, they are soo young at heart Toddy just like you. Aunt Tammy... She is hanging in there even though I know she worries about Dustin all the time. Uncle Chris... I talk too him everyday and he is making alot of changes in his life, for the better I think your leaving hurt him more then any of us know. and that leaves Brennen "BooBoo" Newton.... OHHHH BOY is he one of a kind! Just like his uncle Toddy was :) I talk about you all the time with him and  when we go outside he allways says "Toddy is in the moon" and blows a kiss to the sky. He kisses your pictures and the room I made for you he calls it Toddy and BooBoo's room. He luvs his Unlcle Todd... I will never let him forget you.... I promise. He is growing so fast and it kills me that your not here too see him, I beleive he sees you and that you watch over him, he allways says Unle Toddy funny, and starts laughing and says "yeah Baby" .... and that leaves ME..... hmmm I cant say much because I still miss you like you left yesterday, there are NO words for how much my heart still aches Todd. The only way i am getting thru all of this is knowing I will be with you again someday I luv you Buddy.......  Memories of you keep me going and allways will till we meet again <3 xoxo

they say time heels all wounds beleive me when i tell you thats not true  it seems like yesterday .it's hard when someone like todd and i shared so muchin life i guess more than anyone will ever know theres not a ball game that goes by that i keep thinking todd will call me and say papa  did you see that home run or papa go too channel 541  sports center . and then when he was a yong boy we also collected coins together . he'd say papa some day i will buy that 4 you i'd say ok todd he ment it too  there something about living no one can take away your memories or the love we shared and he'll always be in my mind and my thoughts and theres no doubt in my mind when its my time to go todd will be right there to show me the way and i cant wait love buddy

.                                                                                                      papa            3 - 7- 11

This is a very nice site for Todd. I have lost siblings myself...The pain does not go away...We learn to LIVE with it. The experiences I have learned since my first sibling's passing is that this is TRULY not the end...
Take care and May God Bless...
D ~

  hiya todd

  it hard to write on here, so i`ll just say wot come s into my mind,,

   i know how hearbroken your family are, it`s hard to comprehend,

 it`s something that you`ll never get your head around,, it`s utter  dispare

  

 but i also believe that you`ve just gone on before, not for ever,,

  coz like my son karl, i know we willl  see you again,,  waiting for that day to come is the worse part,,  but for everyday that passes is day nearer to see our precious angels again,,

  it`s  amazing where we the loved down here find the strengh to go on,, but it`s obvious it comes from you,,  

 

when our time is done down here ,, i know you and karl , will be waiting with a great big smile,, and open arms, and you`ll say welcome home,, together forever now we will be

 

    xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

I am so sorry for your loss and hope you and your family are okay.I lost my Son Dec.7,2008 so my heart is with you.The pain of Tood's loss will at times be so severe that you might wonder if you can make it through it.Feeling the pain is part of the healing process,so it is a good cry.Tood is gone and the rest of your family remains.Take good care of each other and be kind to one another.Remember that memories will sustain you and honor his memory.Collect them in a book so you will always have them.I find it conforting to reming myself that we all have the same fate,Tood's came early,but there will be a time to join him.8 months in my grieve I still have days where I do not want to get out of bed and I still cry myself to sleep every night.Find a Compassionate friend meeting,it realy helps..
My depest sympaty,Karin Haley with my son Tim in my heart.

and the Universe saw the perfection of Tood and said.........."just what I wanted".